My sweet Selah turned two yesterday, and as my witty friend Jennifer reminded me, it was just two years ago that I was promising up and down that I would never be “one of those moms.”
I swore that I would not gush ad nauseum about my offspring, posting snapshots or details about such things as her potty training. And yet I’ve overshared so much in the last two years that I even shared a #dailySelahfunfact for a while on twitter…and here I am unabashedly showing off just how adorable I think this girl is.
I made grand statements that Josh and I would parent differently as I rolled my eyes judgmentally at that screaming kid across the restaurant…but I’ve been the exhausted mother with the wailing child now & I don’t think I’m quite such a know-it-all. I still do some things differently on purpose, but I’ve also come to truly appreciate the community of mothers in my life. Thank you for the advice, the gracious smiles that tell me you’ve been there and understand, and your encouragement that I’m doing well.
Primarily I made a vow to myself that becoming a mom would not change me. It sounds ridiculous to my ears now, and although I knew that details of life would change I was serious about Selah not changing my vision for life. And two years later…my oh my…how my vision has changed. And yet, it hasn’t diminished at all like I was fearful of. In fact, my vision and purpose in life has grown as my heart has been expanded by her love.
No longer is purpose part of my to-do list but now it resonates from within…for example, the desire I had to impact women around the globe beats stronger than ever because now I’m raising a future little woman & each day I see all the more value and worth in women. Tears are closer to my eyelids as I read stories of injustice – picturing little girls that could be my own…
I want to open doors for these women...these daughters
In truth, I feel like I’ve become more of Paige over the last two years as I became her mother. And although I hoped to God I would never be “one of those moms” I realize I’m guilty of it…and yet, I’m going to embrace it – because being a mom – whatever sort I am…has been the best parts of my life these last two years.
Happy Birthday sweet girl!