5 Reasons I Always Fall for the Fall

Can you feel it?  The air is a bit crisper, people are singing the praises of pumpkin spice everything, and my kids are back in school (hallelujah)!  Must mean fall is here or almost here, and just today I was rekindling my love affair with Fall.

If you're unsure about fully embracing this best of seasons, I thought I'd share with you 5 reasons why it wins my heart every year.  I'm trying to make converts here today.

1.  Cozy Everything

Could Fall be any cozier?  With the onset of cooler weather, I feel like Fall beckons us to come inside, pull up a blanket, get a hot drink, and snuggle up for ultimate coziness.  And I'm pretty sure that I'm not alone in this love.  I heard today that Lubbock Starbucks were literally out of Pumpkin Spice Lattes.  People were ranting about it on social media - it was serious!!!  They are bringing in a special shipment so peace should resume shortly.  And at our last community group, we devoted an entire 10 minutes just to discussing the best places to get special fall drinks.

And the smells...ahh!  Breathe it in my friends - fall smells are the best!  I'm burning a Pumpkin Cheesecake candle as I type this.  I wouldn't eat a piece of pumpkin cheesecake, but I will most definitely let it's fragrance into my home.  It's glorious!


2.  Missions Launch

Every October for the last 9 years, I have worked to put on a Missions Conference, Banquet and announce short-term trips for the following year.  I love it!  It's  a season when I get to dream, work on projects that have my heart, and connect with friends from around the globe.  And want to know the absolute best part?  It's when people have light-bulb moments about God's heart for the nations.

When ordinary people begin to see that missions is so much more than trips, sad commercials, or memories of begging God as a kid to please not send them to Africa.  When people begin to see that their prayers make a difference...when they make a connection with missionaries or national leaders in a real way...when they or we...become sacrificial in our giving, our prayer life, and our time - it's what changes things.  And it makes me love the fall.


3.  Fall Fashion

Jeans.  Sweaters.  Booties.  Need I say more?  Here is what I'm loving right now in fall fashion.

I'm loving the booties trend right now, and I just purchased some leopard ones from Nordstrom Rack.  They don't look exactly like these, but they are close.  My mama has always told me that leopard counts as a neutral so they go with anything!

I bought a floral bomber jacket from Zara when we were in London and I just LOVE it!  It might be too much for some people, but I have already worn it once and can't wait for it to get a bit cooler so it can become one of my fall staples!  This one here is from H&M - adorable!

I feel like graphic tees are a little overdone, and yet I want to wear one everyday!  And this one right here from jane.com sums up my life.  I'm going to buy this right now.

4.  Fresh Starts

I still think about time in terms of school semesters, and so in my mind, the fall is the beginning of a new season.  The leaves may be slowing fading and falling, but it still feels like the start of new beginnings and opportunity!  So much so, that I've literally started 2 new groups and a new project all in the month of September.

I attended a conference this summer.  God clearly told me to go, and so I boarded the plane alone headed to North Carolina where I'd be surrounded by 700 women whom I had never met, but who I hoped would be a little like me.  I was super nervous to step out, and yet I went with so much expectancy in my spirit.  I knew God had sometime waiting for me there.  Within a couple of hours, I started having some amazing conversations with inspiring yet humble women.

I've been in groups before with women who love Jesus, but something felt different this time.  These women loved Jesus, but they were also running hard - after Him and after the dreams He placed in their hearts.  As I talked to women with bright eyes and contagious laughter, I found myself sharing my own dreams.  And these women, they listened, spoke life, and cheered me on in such a profound way that I left that place feeling like I could do the hard things that were hidden deep inside.

As I boarded the plane back to Lubbock, I started to ask God about the take aways from this time, and He told me to create a similar tribe of women back home.  So I'm working on that.  I invited 7 women who inspire me to lunch and told them about my experience.  I've often heard it said that if we have a need, we should try meeting that need in someone else.  And what better time to start than the fall!

OH!  And, I'm also working on another project that I'll be launching with this one (my sister, Leslie) in October.  It's still secret, but I think you will like it!

5.  Pumpkins

Finally, I love the fall, because pumpkins are so quirky and beautiful!  The girls and I purchased quite a few yesterday, and had so much fun placing them around the house.  They also painted masterpieces (Selah's words) on pumpkins and will be displaying them in their rooms.

Happy Fall Y'all!  Why do you love this season?

I'm Bringing 60+ Seconds with Paige to the Blog!

Hi Friends!  I've been away from the blog for quite some time...but thought I'd pop in to introduce you to something I started for the Bloom Women's Ministry at COTR.  I'm making a weekly video with quick thoughts that will hopefully make you think, make you smile, or make you question.  It's not always brilliant, but it IS brief and hopefully encouraging!  I've been posting them on our facebook page, but I've had some who are not on facebook ask to watch them so from here on out I'll try to post them weekly on the blog!

I'll introduce you by posting 2 of the most recent videos!  Enjoy!



Making Waves - 60 Seconds with Paige (10/27) from Paige Allen on Vimeo.
Comfort Vs. Forgiveness - 60+ Seconds with Paige (11/14) from Paige Allen on Vimeo.

On praying simple prayers, falling in love with a new nation, and trusting God with my dad's heart

As you may have noticed, I have yet to blog this summer because I’ve been doing more important things like playing in the pool with my girls, sipping coffee in the backyard in the mornings, and generally being lazy.  I just love summer.

But over the last couple of weeks, my life picked up it’s pace quite a bit, and I wanted to share a few exciting moments, as well as little lessons that the Lord has taught me.

First, can I just tell you that I love traveling to new places in the world!  I’ve had the opportunity to enter many cultures and lands, and just when I think I’ve found my favorite place or met the most delightful people, I travel somewhere new and immediately have a new favorite.  

I encountered the beautiful people of Nicaragua at the end of June, and their smiles and gentle demeanor are still imprinted in my heart.  I think what I loved the most about the precious men and women that I met, was that although they exuded a gentle grace and joy they were equally passionate and fiery!  

Just look at these ladies!  Can you say GORGEOUS?!  But can you also see the passion in their eyes - LOVE IT!!!

These ladies dressed in gold were dancers who truly worshipped with their whole being.  I was mesmerized by these lovely girls!

And you should meet their fearless leaders, Rony & Mayra Coffer.  Rony is a quiet giant of the faith.  His impact is far reaching in this country (literally reaching into church plants, clinics, and feeding programs throughout villages all over this nation), and his wife Mayra is a ball of energy and zeal!  She loves her people and is leading these women into truth!

The lovely Mayra...this girl can PREACH!

And she was a fabulous translator...she seriously worked non-stop this week!

Rony & Mayra were serving as my illustration...and as you can see...I was a little excited about what I was saying - ha!

And  now for the lesson that I learned from the Lord while I was in Nicaragua: 

I’ve heard it said before that the safest place to be is in the center of God’s will.  And although I agree with the general feelings of this idea, I’ve witnessed over the last couple of years that safety is never really a guarantee when you are where God wants you.  Just ask my friend Matt who was imprisoned while serving in an African nation as a missionary, or ask me to recount my stories from Israel when I entered the country in the middle of a conflict and one day had to take shelter as the incoming missile sirens began to sound.

Safety...not so much.

Comfort...not a chance.

But peace...yes, I do think there is a promise from God that He will grant us His unexplainable peace when we are in the middle of His will.

I got to put this truth to the test as I sat on the plane in Houston awaiting my take-off for Nicaragua.  My dad was scheduled for a heart cath that morning and when he had called to tell me about it he had calmly explained that the doctors were just doing this exploratory procedure to make sure all was well with his heart.  At the most he might need a stint that they would do during the procedure, but he assured me that it was no big deal and to go with confidence...after all, speaking in other nations is my dad's heartbeat and he was excited for me to go to Nicaragua - a nation already deep within his heart.  So imagine my surprise as I texted my sister to find out the verdict of the procedure and received this text in response:

And with these words, I was told to put away all electronic devices and sit back and enjoy my trip to Nicaragua.  I battled in my mind for that entire 3 hour flight.

     How was my dad, really?

     What were the doctors telling my family?

     Why did God orchestrate this trip NOW?

     Would I be back in time for the surgery?

     And how would I focus on ministering to people in Nicaragua when I wanted to be home?

If I'm honest, this battle went on for the rest of the day and late into the night.  I knew all of the right answers to tell myself: 

     He would be fine

     People have this kind of surgery all the time

     What a blessing that they caught it before he had a heart attack

     Focus Paige - you are where you need to be

But I could not get my feelings to line up with these thoughts that I tried to convince myself were the truth.  I tossed and turned that night, and finally awoke at 6am wide awake!  The team was going to meet at 8:30 to prepare for the first day of the conference, so I slipped out of bed and went outside where the Lord and I had it out for the next hour and a half.

I asked quite a few questions with few answers; I vented my frustrations and fears; and then I simply asked that He help.  I needed Him to help my dad.  I needed Him to help my mom.  I needed Him to help me.  I needed Him to help these ladies here in Nicaragua.

Sometimes, the best prayers we can pray are a simple help!

And as my mind began to calm, I opened my Bible and I started to write out Scriptures and prayer.  I wrote Scriptures of faith over my dad's heart and I wrote Scriptures of truth over the women I would soon meet.  I wrote at first unsure if my emotions could believe, but as the time progressed, I discovered that I was writing and praying with a genuine faith.  My emotions were lining up with these Scriptures and the frantic thoughts that had consumed my mind just hours before were now serene and certain.  

My dad would live.  He would live a long and fruitful life.  His heart would beat with a new rhythm that would take him beyond what he has known thus far.

And I was EXACTLY where I should be.  I would speak truth and love and grace and hopefully some revelation to the men and women of Nicaragua.  And I would be more aware than ever before that those words were not from my intellect or greatness because I was truly undone & just clinging to Him.

And as I sat outside in tropical Nicaragua, a peace that truly surpasses all understanding washed over me & reminded me that I was not alone.  I was able to walk confidently in that peace over the next few days. 

I landed back on the tarmac at home, just as my dad was wheeled out of surgery.  I went straight to the hospital & into his room.  He was just beginning to awake from anesthesia, and when I said, "Dad, it's Paige.  I made it home," his eyes fluttered with recognition and KNEW that peace was not just an emotion...it was a reality.  My dad was going to be stronger than ever, and I was going to know that although it's a battle sometimes - you CAN fight for peace.  And you can ask a simple help from the One who is ready to give it.

I'm happy to report that my dad is recovering really well.  He ended up having a quadruple bypass which is pretty major so his recovery will take some time, but he is up and walking (he walked his block a couple days ago)!  Thank you to everyone who has prayed and is praying for our family.  Your prayers have been felt...even across the ocean.

"Mommy! - Did you get her out!"

A couple of weeks ago I took Selah, my 4-year-old daughter, to work with me. She was so excited as it felt very special & we were having a fun time putting some newsletters together & getting ready for our annual Miles for Missions race. She got bored after a couple of hours so I let her play games on my computer while I kept working around the office.

On one of my bookshelves, I have the picture that SOS gave me a couple years ago of a young girl behind bars with a verse about rescuing those who are helpless. I was busy in work mode when all of a sudden Selah says, “Mommy, why is that little girl behind those bars?”

I was shocked that she had noticed this…and I quickly asked the Holy Spirit for guidance on what to say. I said something like, “Well, it’s just a picture that reminds me to pray for kids around the world. There are so many kids who have hard things in their life. That is why we pray for India and other countries at night. Do you remember how you have been praying with me for kids around the world?”

She said yes & I thought our conversation was over.

A couple minutes passed and she said.  “Mom, is that little girl in India?”

“Yes,” I said. That’s why I went to India in November – remember, Mommy’s big trip? I got to meet precious kids that we help!”

She nodded & again I thought we were finished.

About five minutes passed when she said with tears in her eyes, “Mommy, is that girl still trapped behind those bars? Did you get her out?!”

I must have hesitated for a minute because she almost got frantic. “Mommy! Did you get her out?!”
I was in tears at this point, so I just said, “Yes, baby. She is okay. She got out. She is okay.”

As you can imagine, I couldn’t focus much on work for the rest of the day. Today as I’ve been praying the Lord brought that conversation back to my mind. Praying for that same level of urgency to remain in us everyday. May our hearts be plagued with the question “Did we get them out?”
I am thankful to Sower of Seeds for infecting my heart with the desire to do small things to see more girls set free.

“Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked.” Psalm 82:4

Back to India I Go

I’m getting on a plane tomorrow…without my family…to go to India, and in many ways it still doesn’t seem real.  India captured a part of my heart over 6 years ago and the people in this land have changed me.

I haven’t stepped foot on the soil since I was 5 months pregnant with Selah and I’m curious to discover how much more the poverty and the children will affect me now that I am a Momma. 

I still remember one face the first day that I walked the streets of India.  Her pleading eyes and dirty hands lifted up to me.  My heart broke in India like it has never been broken before – it was a needed breaking – it was a look into reality – into the face of much of the world that we can easily ignore.  It was a “break my heart for what breaks Yours” moment, and her face changed me.

I can never prepare the teams that I take for the heart-break that they will encounter.  The poverty is all consuming, the culture so different, and with long held beliefs in karma and millions of gods the hopelessness can be deafening.  Josh describes India as an assault on all your senses, and although it’s usually taken as a negative description, I’ve discovered that in my life, I usually need that assault.

I need to be shaken – to be reminded of what the world faces while I’m busy posting cute pictures of my girls on Instagram.  I need to be woken up – not just to the pain but to the truth of God’s great hope.

This is from a school that I visited on my 2nd trip to India.  I LOVE what SOS is doing to feed & educate children!

And I’ve seen the hope of God more clearly in India than in anywhere else in the world.  Perhaps it’s because it’s in such contrast with the devastation…but regardless, in India, it is always more clear to me than ever that He alone is the answer.

The first year I went I was changed by that little girl on the street, but I was also changed by former prostitutes that I met in a church located in the heart of the red-light district.  The service was loud and exciting.  Jesus was there and the gospel was clear.  At the conclusion of the service, communion was served and tears pricked my eyes as men and women – outcasts previously – stood in the aisle eagerly awaiting the bread and cup.  I was asked to walk between these faces and serve the bread.

That walk down the aisle changed me.  I saw hope and freedom and joy in the eyes of so many women who I knew had previously been surrounded with fear and lies and death.  As these precious ones reached out for the bread I was ashamed of the way I casually come to His table.  They fully knew of His truth and they were immersed in His kingdom…and as their hands reached out they were literally reaching for life!  Their eyes shown with such hope and joy that by the time I reached the end of that aisle I was weeping in wonder at this God that I not only serve, but in that moment was representing.

India always changes me.  And so although I’ve got a 3-year old and 18-month old, I told my husband last year…I’ve got to get to India.  If I’m to continue to serve specifically in the areas of missions & prayer at my church – I’ve got to go – I need to see what He is doing and I want to be a small part of His light in this place that always imparts back into my soul.

This is from a Women's Conference that I spoke at a few years ago - I LOVE the women of India!  They are more powerful than they know.

So would you pray for me?  I’m taking 5 extraordinary women with me.  None are from my home church, as I felt the Lord direct me to spread this experience and His heart-beat with others.  So I invited specific friends and acquaintances that God showed me and I’m beyond excited to walk with these girls.

We have a busy week ahead of us: Women’s Meetings will be a big part, and we will also have 3 days in which we focus on the area of human trafficking.  I’m especially burdened by one day in which we have the opportunity to encourage the men and women who work on the front lines to battle this horrible injustice – we will spend a day with those who rescue, and I’m praying that our time breathes a bit of God’s love and refreshment into their lives.

Would you also pray for my sweet family?  Pray that the days go by quickly and with great fun for my girls.  Pray for God’s grace for my husband and parents who will watch my girls.

And would you pray for India?  Pray that God would continue to make Himself known, that the church would be strengthened, and that injustice would vanish. 

Where laundry is done...

What I Learned While Traveling the World with My Babies this Summer (Part 2)

As I mentioned in my previous post, the main lesson that I learned while traveling to Europe with my babies this summer is that God can be glorified in a place where we focus on doing less and being more.  This is hard for me.  I like to be busy.  I like to do things, but I'm learning day by day to embrace His grace and walk in it.

I'm also learning to find joy and His fingerprints in the messes of life.  I don't like messes either, but this simple lesson was on full display as we traveled to Europe this summer with our girls (honestly, is it even POSSIBLE to travel with a 3 year old & 13 month old without a giant mess in your wake?)...and I think I'm starting to get it.  God can be in the midst of the mess.  He isn't nearly as uncomfortable as I am, and He really does love using the foolish and weak parts of our lives to show off.  Here's two ways He demonstrated this to me on our trip:

Fashion Class and "Glitter Nails" in Czech Republic
We were teaching in a creative arts camp while in Czech Republic and I was assigned to help my
amazing friend Dita teach fashion class.  Now, while I DO love a good pair of shoes & sometimes tune into Fashion Police, I am far from a fashionista and I know next to nothing about designing clothes, which is what this class would be doing.

Leading up to the camp, Dita would email me her amazing ideas (creating wedding dresses out of plastic, t-shirt transformation, and a lecture on Grace Kelly style), and often asked what I wanted to contribute.  Contribute?  As in teach something about fashion?  I had nothing.  I scoured Pinterest, but discovered that my best ideas had been done in previous years at the camp.  The only idea that I had to offer that seemed of interest was "glitter nails."  Now, I had never done "glitter nails."  I had read about it on Pinterest and seen some successful ventures on the hands of a few friends.  It looked easy enough, and I felt confident as I purchased numerous shades of polish & glitter from Wal-Mart - I could make this fabulous!

Dita gives the girls her opinion on their latest des

My first day in fashion class was fun albeit a little overwhelming.  I was trying to get into a rhythm of juggling my babies while also connecting with the young people, and I just tried to stay up.  We colored fashion designs and played with pastels to get a feeling for how color works with fabric.  I smiled at the sweet girls in our class and had barely exchanged names when our 3 hours class was finished.

Each day got progressively easier while the projects were progressively harder.  We created dresses, painted t-shirts, and designed wedding gowns out of plastic.  I quickly realized that I needed to at least try to help with fabrics & design.  I remember clearly trying to help my girls with the wedding dress and thinking to myself, "I am making a mess!"  And in that moment, I felt God whisper, "I can be in a mess...just keep working at it."  And so I stapled and fitted plastic on our model.  We laughed together and little by little we transformed yards of white plastic into a beautiful gown that I was quite proud of (if I do say so myself).

The final day of camp we had a fashion show & party where each class was able to show off what they had learned.  As we prepared for our walk down the cat-walk, Dita asked if I could give each of the girls "glitter nails" so we could look fierce.  Absolutely!

And so, in the last few minutes of class with these precious girls, I helped create another mess.  We started to paint and add glitter to our fingers when I realized that we were not looking like the Pinterest pictures that I had seen.  It was a mess.  At first I wanted to panic with the realization that this was not living up to my preconceived ideas of fabulous "glitter nails" when I looked around to see that the girls didn't see the lack of perfection that I was so sensitive to...instead, these girls who had bonded over the previous week were oohing and aahing over one another's hands.  There was laughter in the room, and more than a couple of the girls asked if I could paint their nails for them (I was, after all the "glitter nail" expert).  And in that stuffy classroom across globe, I felt the presence of God.

With sparkles of glitter on these young women that I now loved, I silently prayed that they would find Him.  May they be drawn to the One who makes life radiant.  May they see that He alone can redeem and create beauty from the messes we are so prone to create.

Pastel drawings as we practiced with color

Our plastic wedding dresses as modeled in the fashion show

Selah's FAVORITE moment of the entire trip - modeling her t-shirt in the fashion show

Puddle Jumping in Norway
Our week in Norway was focused on prayer and encouraging our good friends (Sean & Hannah) as they prepare to plant a church in September.  Again, we would "do missions" by just "being with them."  Everyday was spent prayer walking for a couple of hours & then we would simply hang out - talking, dreaming, bouncing ideas off one another.  In the midst of this talking and prayer, we had five children in their house, which could only mean one thing - plenty of messes.

I gave up after a couple of hours trying to pick up after my girls.  It was a loosing battle, and we all decided to just relax and let them have some fun.  In my mind, this was fine when we were at home, but when it was time to do our prayer walks we should be extra spiritual - no messes.

I think God was laughing at my attempts to be spiritual, because on our very first prayer walk we definitely encountered a mess.  We walked to a school where they plan on meeting for their church services, and because it had been raining for days the parking lot was dotted with puddles as big as a playa lake.  Our kids were in strollers, and so the adults took a few minutes to walk around the school praying and seeking God...and being spiritual.  I was focused in prayer when I heard my daughter's laughter across the parking lot.

As I looked up, I realized that she & Sean's oldest son had gotten out of the strollers and were running, jumping, and splashing in the giant puddles!  My first thought was that she would be soaked, and that I wasn't up to the mess that would certainly ensue, when I was reminded of my recent lesson in Czech Republic - God can be in the mess.

And so, I decided to let her play, and I stood back and smiled at the joy of these two small children.  It was better than Disney World!  They laughed and shrieked, and before I knew it, all of the adults were cheering them on.  God spoke to my heart a lot that day - about jumping a little more...about trusting Him even when what is before me looks like a mess...about the joy that is all around if I will look for it...and about this church plant.  Our friends are probably going to make a mess or two.  They will definitely be forced to jump out of their comfortable and clean lives to make an impact in Norway, but they are saying yes to God and ready to make a mess for Him.

We prayed that day while our kids jumped in puddles that this school would be a blessing for their church...that they would find favor there & that God would get glory as they make a mess for His kingdom.  And guess what?  Two weeks later, they met with the principal of that school and were given three rooms to meet in each week...for free.  Let the puddle jumping begin in Norway!

What I Learned While Traveling the World with My Babies This Summer (Part 1)

It's been a month since we were in Czech Republic, but as I've reflected over the last couple of weeks, I wanted to share a few lessons that I learned while away.  For those of you unaware of our family adventure, Josh and I decided to take our two girls with us this year as we led a short-term missions team to Czech Republic.  We then sent the team home and traveled for another week to Norway so we could see our friends and spend some time praying with them as they prepare to plant a church next month.

When we first decided to take our girls with us I knew it was the right decision in my heart.  Josh and I have traveled internationally in a short-term capacity for years.  In fact, some of our dearest friends now live across the globe, and before I became pregnant I had a bit of a bargaining session with God.  It went something like this:

Me: If I agree to this whole kid thing, what is it going to do to our love and sense of calling when it comes to international travel and missions?

God: I don't understand?

Me: Well, do I have to give it all up?

God: No.

Me: Well, how is it going to work?

God: You'll see.

Me: I don't like this answer.  I would like you to expound please.

God: You'll see.

Me: Again, I need more details before I commit to these children I think You intend for me to have.

God: Sigh...Paige, some things in your life are gonna change - change for the better actually - and you'll just have to trust me on this one.  But I will tell you this about travel.  It's going to change too, but overall, if I give you the grace and love for the nations, don't you think I can grace your kids too?  You and Josh know that I've called you as a family to this...and that calling can extend to new additions of your family...including small additions.

Me: Okay...do you promise?

God: Trust Me.

****Hope you know, I just took great liberty with this conversation, but in general it went something like that, and from that day forward I had an internal sense and belief that God would give grace to my girls for whatever He wanted us to do as a family.

So, I knew in my heart that travelling as a family was the right thing, but I have to confess that as the date of the trip drew near I began to panic.  How would the flight work?  I mean, I have a 13 month old who crawls and moves and is BUSY!  How would I keep her at bay for a 10 hour flight?  And what about jet lag?  Packing?  And our poor team?  Would the 7 young people traveling with us explode at some point with Selah's amazing propensity to ask "Why?" 57 times in a row?

Suffice it to say, I started to pray a lot and I made plenty of lists.  The morning that we left I woke up with my stomach in knots, and it wasn't until we had been on our longest flight for a couple of hours that I finally took a deep breath and remembered God's promise to me - my girls had His grace for this trip.

And His grace is always sufficient.

We helped with a creative arts camp in Czech Republic & one day Haven got to be a model for the photography class.  She was definitely up for the task!

Throughout the trip I was continually amazed at His grace.  My girls laughed more, played more, and slept more than I could have ever imagined!  The team embraced my babies and someone seemed to always have them on their hips.  And not only that...but I saw how God wanted to use my girls to bring His love into the lives of the amazing young people we met in Czech Republic.  A 13 month old with a big toothy grin can bring down defenses like nothing else, and I found myself having easy conversations because they were kicked off with laughter at my kids antics.

These sweet girls were in my fashion class that helped out with & they were quite smitten with Haven

So, the greatest lesson that I learned while we were away was that if God says it...He can do it.

Also, there really is something to doing less and being more.  I read that statement a while back, and I'm realizing that in essence this what I did on this trip.  At one point I was feeling the pressure that perhaps I wasn't DOING ENOUGH at the camp because of the needs of my girls.  Wasn't I supposed to be helping more?

I texted my mom & mother-in-law about this frustration and asked for them to pray, when my mother-in-law sent me this text:
     God's Love is being communicated greatly through your family of 4.  So rest in that.  Meaningful 
     conversations may "look" differently this trip, but KNOW THIS, His will IS being performed, and 
     you are grooming two amazing missionaries, even now, carried in your arms.

Such wisdom and such truth.

And now, as I'm back in "real life" I'm asking myself how I can be more while doing less...how I can bring my girls more fully into the life I know I'm called to live...and how I can rest in His promise of grace.

Josh talking with the team all while juggling his girls

The plane ride was one of Selah's favorite parts!  The time went fast, and there are plenty of great blogs out there with ideas on how to keep your kids entertained on long flights.

Selah enjoyed painting in fashion class...she jumped right in with the "big girls"

And our amazing team made my girls laugh to know end.  In all honesty, they may have been tired of Selah's "roars" in their face (she was a lion or something for a couple days) but they were the best people to travel with

Shouting from My Rooftop Today!

When I was a little girl I dreamed of being an actress and a lawyer.  I sometimes thought I’d like to be a preacher and I even had a stint in which the President sounded like a pretty good gig.  And when I got older and started traveling the world with my dad I secretly asked God if I might be allowed to be a missionary.  I fell hard for beautiful brown skinned people in Guatemala - so much so that I took an extra year of Spanish in high school with the hopes that one day I could really share my heart with those I had met.

That question of being a missionary was something God and I talked about often in my twenties too.  I had fallen in love with a new people group - this time they were strong and silent - Czech atheists who were intrigued by my belief but still rather aloof.  I thought perhaps Josh and I could move and open a business for a season eating pastries and talking about Jesus with these brilliant minds(seriously, that is still a good idea)...and then I traveled to India.  I laughed and cried and my heart melted in the big brown eyes of women and children who had lost seemingly everything and yet still had hope in Him. 

I once again talked to God about being a missionary after meeting these precious souls, but He was redefining what missions should look like for me, and my heart found great joy and purpose in being one who mobilizes...one who does her best to shout from the rooftops that we have a job to do out there.

And yet I often realize that my voice should be louder (it should be heard here on my blog) and so I am on this rooftop of my blog shouting about those who have inspired me to tears recently.  Will you listen to my shouts?

Matthew
I’ve been inundated with emails and text messages and prayer chains for the last 20 days as a young man - just two years older than I - was detained in a North African country for questioning.  His lovely wife and three children were left with unanswered questions - maintaining joy and resolve even in the midst of tears.  My heart and my mouth prayed for him daily for the last 20 days.  I’ve reflected on the last conversation we had - as he shared with me about his calling to this people group - and knowing the great risk he was taking.

I’ve prayed with his precious mama over and over again.  Her passion to pray and her love for his captors has been astounding to watch.  And I’ve talked to friends who know him much better than I and I’ve seen how the reality of what he is doing has sunk into our hearts - leading us to an internal search...asking if we are really being obedient to what He has asked.

And my heart rejoices this morning as he was released last night and is now safe with his family in another country - but still praying for his recuperation and his children’s understanding and his wife - oh my Lord, the conversations she must be having with Him in this moment...

And I realize that if Matthew can sit in a solitary cell for 20 days...then I can shout a bit louder.

Tony & Carrie
I put together a fundraising banquet this past Friday for missionaries to Guatemala, Tony & Carrie Taylor.  If I’m honest I was tempted to raise funds for something that I KNEW would pull the heartstrings of those in attendance.  But as I stopped and listened I knew that God was pointing to this precious couple.

Tony & Carrie are good soil.  I know no better way to describe them.  Faithful, humble, unassuming, obedient - they are the only missionaries in their region.  They have whispered to me that they are lonely and would love for God to send someone to join them...and yet they do not give up but rather give more.

And so I went into the banquet with the goal of raising $20,000 MAYBE $30,000 for their project...and yet people were generous and they GOT this vision of missions...and last I checked we had raised over $43,000!  I think God was wanting to let Tony & Carrie know that He is with them - He sees them (even on their lonely days) and He is so proud.

Internationals from Czech Republic, Poland, Kenya, Nicaragua, Belgium, Slovenia, & Israel
I wish I could list the names of the valiant men and women I rubbed shoulders with this past week - they were inspirational.  Each with their own stories of God’s love for their nations as well as tremendous obstacles that are ever present.  So much fire for their nations...so much love...so much determination.  I was in awe.

My favorite moment with all of these guests was on Tuesday night (a week ago), over 20 of us gathered - more internationals than Americans and we broke bread together.  Some indoors many outside - we talked and laughed and listened to music...and it was...heavenly.  Truly I thought - one day all nations will be together - enjoying the music of heaven and praising our creator.

I glanced across the way and saw my baby, Haven, in the arms of a Czech mama.  I looked to my left and saw men from Poland and Belgium and the US in deep discussion about theology.  I looked to the right and saw children doing somersaults in the grass while voices from Kenya and Israel wafted in the air, discussing in detail tensions in their countries.  And in that moment I knew God was there.  I knew God was pleased.  Just a small gathering of the nations - but a little glimpse of seeing a few of His kids together...and yet, how many more of His kids just don’t know?  Don’t know His love...His justice...His compassion...His truth?

So many don’t know...but there is hope.  For men like Matthew and couples like Tony and Carrie and countless international pastors across the globe are on their own rooftops shouting...and loving...and being the hands of Jesus.

When Art Is A Call For Justice

I don't consider myself much of an artist, but I've decided to take on an art project to use at our annual Pursue Missions Conference.  This conference is kind of my second baby - the Lord spoke to me very clearly several years ago that one of my purposes was to be someone who gets missions & justice in the hearts of West Texans.  I've learned over the years that I can't place anything into another's heart...but I can do my best to stir up thoughts - to expose people to stories of injustice and hope - for those stories make a lasting impact in the heart.

This year at Pursue the theme is FOCUS - I feel like there are so many causes and so many voices clamoring for our attention that we do one of two things - we either shut down because the voices cause us to feel helpless...we feel like we can't really make an impact in any of the areas where need is great, so instead we become paralyzed and don't try to make any dent...OR we try to give to every voice that we hear, which in turn leaves us feeling stretched and ineffective.  As I prayed this year about our annual conference, all I could think about what a statement that Keith Wheeler (a missionary who carries the cross) would say in college.


Ministry is nothing more than an overflow of Jesus' love in my heart.  

As I thought on that quote...it became clear to me that my small efforts are most effective when they come out of a heart that is full of His love.  It is when I know that I am loved by Him...when I see His grace at work in my own life that I am most aware of injustice in this world.  It is then that I want others to experience that love...that grace...that joy.  It is then that my efforts are most sincere and beautiful.

And so this year we are focusing - Focusing on Him & then trying to help others actually focus on what they can do - the simple and the complex...the small and the big...the prayers and the gifts...the overflow of love.

I am a big believer is using all sorts of methods to get stories and this message of focus into hearts.  I came up with the idea that this year we would take photographs from all over the world that have a story - we have blown them up into huge portraits & we are asking people to turn them into art - to say something with the picture...

And this brings me back to where I began - my art project this weekend.

I'm taking this picture - it's a picture that I personally took 4 years ago in India.  I was at a school with 4 years olds and I couldn't help but notice that this beautiful small girl had feet that were painted red.  Her little toes were barefoot in the school in the middle of the slum & her ankles sang with each step she took as the anklets she wore jingled.

I pulled aside one of our contacts from India and inquired as to why her feet were painted red.

It's a sign that she has been married to another.  I shook my head in disbelief certain that I had misheard, but my fears were confirmed - at the age of 4 this small girl had been given to another in marriage - for reasons unknown to us.  Perhaps because it was a way to align the family with another or because of religious insistence.  The contact assured me that she was not living this marriage out, but that she would be given to this person she did not know as an early age - her life...her path was determined at the age of 4.

I took a picture of those beautiful feet and this picture has hung in my office from that day forward - a reminder to pray for this one and so many like her...girls in India - precious girls who's lives feel hopeless - that they would meet the author of hope.  That the color red would take on new meaning one day - that their feet...and their hearts would encounter the red blood of Jesus that covers all.

And so, I'm looking at this giant picture of red feet & asking Jesus how to send a message with this art piece.  I feel as though I'm to put scriptures and prayers around her feet (hopefully it will seem artistic) but mostly I want them to be a declaration of hope over her life...

And here is where I would love your help.  Would you share in the comments section scriptures or prayers that are on your heart?  Perhaps they are directed at this young woman or perhaps for the injustice that this one story stirs.  I want to use thoughts beyond my own to paint a picture of God's hope for this life.

As a thank you for sharing, I will draw one name from everyone who comments and send you a matted picture of these beautiful feet so you too can remember to pray.

Back from Czech Part 2 - Friendships and Partnerships that Go the Distance

Dita & Lukas in front of a theater billboard highlighting their church

Our trip to Czech Republic was the result of our good friends Lukas & Dita Targosz inviting myself and my dad to speak at their annual Family Fest.  We have built a friendship with Lukas and Dita over the past 8 years and our church, Church on the Rock, has built a partnership with their church – Element (www.element.cx) . 

For the past 8 years we’ve sent mission teams to partner with Element, and watching this partnership and friendship grow has become a highlight in ministry for me over the years.  As many of you know I organize around 10 mission trips every year for COTR and Pursue Missions and around 3 years into doing trips I became convicted about the way many “do missions” in the states.

I realized that many American Christians are guilty of simply doing what I would call drive-by trips.  They love seeing new cultures, tasting new foods, meeting new people…and although they do go with good hearts and do want to see the church built in other nations, they are quick the next year to decide to go to a new location.  They want the excitement of something BRAND NEW and they leave behind the national church planters to try and establish new partners.

I must admit that I like experiencing new cultures as much as the next person (I so badly want to go to Africa!), but I’ve found that what I love more – is actually planting a piece of my heart in one or two locations and watching God do something amazing!  That is what has happened to Josh and I when it comes to Czech Republic.

Our first trip 8 years ago just so happened to fall a few weeks before Lukas and Dita were going to plant what later became Element.  We didn’t know this brave couple yet, but they welcomed our team of 7 with open arms and took us around the city of Hradec Kravlove.  They shared with us their hopes for the people of this city…they shared with us why they had chosen to plant a church in this location…and as we traversed the city and prayed at many locations I began to get great hope in my heart as well.  I WANTED Lukas and Dita to succeed.  I could envision a church in this city that had so little Christian influence, and when I came home 8 years ago I had given a small piece of my heart to HK.

We’ve gone back almost every year (this was our 8^th trip since 2003).  We’ve taken teams to teach in schools, we’ve brought bands to draw crowds, we’ve  gone just as a couple to encourage and share – and EACH time a little more of our hearts have been given.

Josh & I teaching in a Czech school in 2006.

Swingletrees playing a concert on one of our mission trips.

 And so with this trip, I have to tell you that our hearts were overflowing when we saw with our eyes what God has done in the last 8 years.  Those prayers and dreams that Lukas and Dita first shared with us were unfolding before our eyes – we saw Czech people, many who were atheists only a year or two ago (probably close to 100 of them) worshipping God with abandon.   

Worship during the Czech Service at Element.

We saw international college students serving with determination and love.  How fun to see young people from Kenya and Norway…Ghana and Dubai working alongside Czech church planters for the sake of the Kingdom.

Two of my favorite Element girls - Veronica & Theodora

 It was a sight to see, and it made us proud!  And it was there standing with this brave group of believers that I once again was reminded why I’m so glad I haven’t just done missions to see new sights and to have stories to tell.  I’ve done missions to build lasting friendships – to make an investment in a community.  I’ve done missions many times but to only a few places…and it’s changed me more than I know.

By the way, we’re not the only ones who’ve given to this friendship and partnership.  Lukas and Dita have traveled to Lubbock as well.  They’ve come to support our Pursue Conferences, Lukas has taught in our Ministry Training School, and this past October – Lukas trained our staff and spoke in our weekend services.  This is the sign of a true partnership – where Americans put down our pride of being the only ones who have something to give & realize that our fellow Christian leaders around the globe have a WEALTH of wisdom, experience, and truth to share with us!

May we all find places to plant our hearts…our time…and our prayers.  

Selah loves her Czech Aunt & Uncle!

 Oh, and if you read the Czech language, you should check out Lukas' blog - www.lukastargosz.blogspot.com